#i still feel like 18 years old | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

otamotone-dnp · 1 year ago

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i think I can feel my frontal lobe developing

#i turn 25 in almost 6 months #what #i still feel like 18 years old #i feel simultaneously old and also immature at the same time #there’s so many adult things I don’t know how to do #like taxes and mortgages #the thought of having to do everything for myself is overwhelming #make every doctor’s appt #keep care of myself #pay every bill #go to work every day #and if I don’t #bad things happen to me and my life #like I already pretty much do that now but my mom will help me out lol #but she can’t make my doctor’s appointments forever #like the only reason I am even going to the dentist this year is because my teeth started hurting #i need to get my shit together #other

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icarianstars · 2 months ago

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Was I meant to feel happy that my life was just about to change?

#I will never not be angry about Regina’s backstory #she was a child!!!#SHE! WAS! A! CHILD!#She was 18 years old and forced to marry a man old enough to be her father #after watching the man she loved be murdered in front of her by her own mother #forced to play mother to a girl she couldn’t stand when she was still just a kid herself #she was abused and manipulated her entire life and yet everyone acts like it was her fault she went dark #in case you couldn’t tell I have a lot of feelings about her #anyway #regina mills #regina mills fanart #once upon a time #ouat #ouat fanart #my art

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gumy-shark · 2 months ago

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on one hand never trust how you feel about yourself as a person after the sun goes down, especially if you have a known pattern of catastrophizing your own behavior into you somehow being a secretly evil Bad Person. on the other hand night time is when i do my best introspection

#this post was brought to you by the realization that even though i want to be and like being a person that ppl can turn to when they need it #that i also don’t really like being Depended On #i care about my friends especially the ones who are still in high school #but it’s also scary to me when i feel like they Rely on me for friendship or connection.#like no. i should be peripheral to your life.#they should have people other than a mildly flaky 18 year old who hides when it gets hard and who they only see every few months at best #even back in junior high. i had a friend who was older than me but a grade below who called me ‘mom’ as a joke #but then it stopped feeling like a joke and i didn’t know how to re-establish that distance #oh yeah this is also a thing that happens at night btw. we start oversharinggg

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nexus-nebulae · 5 months ago

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me as a kid: i have all these problems

every adult around me: you're not old enough to know what's wrong with you, you're fine

me as an adult: i still have all these problems

my doctors after i finally got the opportunity to choose them myself: oh my fucking god why have you never gotten help for all these problems. you should have seen me 10 years ago

#problems i have finally gotten help for that i was told i was not old enough to know about:#AMPS (was told it was anxiety and then when i kept coming back they said it was fibro Quite Literally just to get me to shut up)#(like the doc i just saw literally said 'they diagnose fibromyalgia here when they dont know what the problem is but dont feel like testing)#multiple food allergies (was also told the stomach pain and vomiting was anxiety)#seborrheic dermatitis (i was told 'youre just stressed thats why you have a rash')#(which- if im so stressed my skin is literally dying MAYBE I STILL NEED HELP?????????)#autism and adhd (my father knew! but refused to get me assessed bc if i dont have a diagnosis theres no problem right :)#anxiety disorder (oh so when I'm in pain i DO have anxiety but when i say i have anxiety I'm overreacting okay)#dyscalculia and possibly dyslexia ('you just need to try harder' I've asked for a tutor five times)#some of my doctors don't actually believe me about some of these problems BECAUSE i have no records from when i was a kid #they're like 'it just popped up at 18? seems suspicious......' like I WASN'T ALLOWED TO GO TO THE DOCTOR'S UNTIL THEN #there's definitely more but I'm still mad abt it #i might not be in a wheelchair Almost All The Time if i had gotten help BEFORE i lost half the feeling in my legs #i KNEW the fibro was a BS diagnosis #i tried to get assessed for autism at 16 and was told i have schizotypal personality disorder instead with literally zero testing #like my psych just refused to allow me to get tested for autism she was like 'no you have spd i Just Know'#same psych that said there was zero way i had anything like DID because my symptoms didn't present Exactly like the Only other #patient at the clinic with DID. i want to note that that was a 14 year old boy still being actively abused #and i was a 20 year old who was in a safe environment and had distanced myself from my abusers and stressors

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redrobin-detective · 2 years ago

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Shout out to the fics you read years and years ago, fics you found on a whim late at night and read and moved on and yet their stories haunt. Pour one out for those fics you stand no chance in hell of finding again and yet even long after you read those words, you still find yourself affected by them. Here’s to the stories that exist without name, author or even words but just the gentle impression they left on you long ago.

#I read so much DP fic back in the day on FF that I'll never see again #I still remember one of the first I read where Danny had his accident became Phantom in front of sam and tuck #and then then fled hid from everyone for years and was in college when he hears of trouble in amity and returns #i read that like 18 years ago like just a random ass fic I read at 2am and yet #I think about it sometimes out of the blue how it made ME feel as a young 13 year old about the idea of abandoning everything to run #idk if the author cares about this story #if anyone else remembers it #it passed in and out of my life in less than a hour and yet a full childhood lifespan later I am making a tumblr post about it #there's something a little bit magical about that I think

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httpiastri · 8 months ago

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wait what ,, estelle was dming fanpages?

well this is the post i saw

i think it's very understandable that she's freaking out over ppl both outing her surname and contacting random ppl just to get info about her…. that must be so scary :(

#like even if she's 25 and dating an 18-year-old #she still doesn't deserve this imo #i feel kinda bad for her #'it wouldn't be necessary if you didn't manipulate your identity in the media' oh so that makes it okay??#bullshit #asks!#anon!

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bookinit02 · 3 months ago

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literally what a day i am still shaking

#i didn’t realize how scary it would be to teach for the first time😭#like i feel like my social anxiety has gotten so much better over the last few years but this was like.#social anxiety on Crack #i did do really well like i think you’d barely even be able to tell i was nervous #just bc when i’m scared i kind of disassociate and go on auto-pilot so i usually seem fine #but like. i have been replaying every second of it in my brain all day nitpicking for places i messed up #and this one guy made a Comment when i walked in which did not help #genuinely overall it went so well and everyone was so nice #but still. SCARY😭#luckily (?) i will be teaching 4 days a week for the next 2 years.#so i will have plenty of time to get used to it lmao #it’s weird bc i tutor so often but turns out small groups of Children online #is very different than a full class of 18-19 year olds😭#anyway. hopefully i will get Less nervous bc i would hate to feel like this every day

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bugmistake · 6 months ago

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sometimes its so crazy to realize that there's actually a lot of things i like. that i thought i didn't like because i was a depressed teenager. i love being outside! i love swimming! i love talking to people! even strangers sometimes! i love getting dressed in fun outfits and doing makeup! i love reading and going to art museums! i just thought i was doomed forever to a life of complete and total apathy and void! and now look at me! still a little shaky but i'm doing it!!!!!

#reaching back thru the spacetime continuum to grab 15 year old bunny and shake him by the shoulders a little bit and go hey!!!#it's not ALWAYS gonna be like this!!!#one day you're gonna be 23 and it'll still be like this sometimes!!!#sometimes you'll still wake up and feel it but it won't be all the time!!!!!!#you're gonna have friends who know you and see you even the ugly parts of you #and they're still gonna love you anyways!!!!! it's not over yet i promise!!!!!!#and then one day when i'm 34 i'm sure i'll think the same thing about me now #but until then! it's me and myself when i was 22 and 21 and 20 and 19 and 18 and 17 and 16 and 15 #and 14 and 13 and 12 and 11 and 10 and 9 and 8 and 7 and 6 and 5 and 4 and 3 and 2 and 1

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luxsea · 2 months ago

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being almost 24 but still feeling like you just graduated high school

#olive.txt #no exaggeration the past 6 years dont feel like they happened #everyone i went to school with has already graduated college #and i dont want to reconnect w anyone bc what do i say #i dont want pity but im so not where i want to be #18 yr old me would ask me why i still havent left yet and strangle me

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ryuseitai · 3 months ago

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i really regret dropping out of school

#everyday forever #and a lot of other things as well #i feel like i have such a disproportionate amount of regret in my bones for being only 18 years old #maybe ime being dramatic about some of them #and there is no use in dwelling on any of them #But still. Damn. Lights cigar #liike fuuuuuuuuck #as a kid before i ever even stopped going to school #id be annoyed at adults that were like ooohhh you gotta stay in school yo u gotta #but yeah. yea #i m still a little annoyed at ppl that like harass me about college. bc thats a bit different.#but high school.. dont drop out ever u will be done with it eventually i promise just dont drop out #sometimes ppl that are in hs but just a year or two younger than me hear that i dropped out #and are like i wish i could do that.or i wish my parents would let me do that No you dont no you dont you dont #PLEAse stay in school. For me.

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wri0thesley · 4 months ago

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As a 2008 gen z, I see lots of 2014-2013-2012 wanting so hard to be gen z asswell and looking up at them. Since you are an early gen Z, did you also look up to millenials, wishing you were one? To be honest, I feel like its kind of unfair the hate a lot of people give them just for being young. When pandemic hit, in 2020, I had lots of online friends, some of them being 15-16yo, but they never judged me for being 12. Thinking of it, back then almost nobody was judging anybody. Why shoud they get hate for no reason? Its pretty unfair since its not their fault at all. There are some early gen alpha kids who are saying messed up stuff that they dont even understand which is really something that is not ok. However, we as a generation musnt go ahead and just judge and analyze the situation. We grew up with the rage bait: "cereal first and then milk" and "pinapple belongs on pizza". They however, grew up withbthe rage bait: "im gonna 🍇you" or "go back to thr kitchen", which is really not cool.

Whats ur opinion about theres things?

i was born in 1996 which makes me a millennial (JUST)! i’m the last year of the millennial dhfhghg

honestly? i don’t think about it much. i have a 17 year old nephew and an 11 year old nephew and a 5 year old niece so i am seeing how kids mature and stuff nowadays but . . . idk, the biggest change for me is that they all have tech younger.

if anything i think the kids nowadays are more understanding. they get pronouns and they don’t care about sexuality and they care about their trans friends (even though the uk is ofc terf island the kids i know seem alright!). maybe it’s bc my nephews are pretty nerdy and make nerdy friends? idk

but also i absolutely grew up with rage bait like the second one. rape jokes were way more common (the term ‘frape’ if a friend left their facebook logged in). every generation has stuff that sucks and stuff that doesn’t! me being like “i don’t understand the Youth” is just the same as my parents or my older brother (six year age difference) Not Getting Me. mostly i would like to think that the kids are Okay!!!

#it’s weird being Old #i’m married to a 30 year old !!!#i feel like i’m still seventeen tbh #nat.txt #disclaimer: i’m aware that at 28 i’m not really ‘old’ but it’s weird when you feel So Much Younger than you are #partly from the years i spent agoraphobic and then the pandemic on top…#my singing teacher teaches college and says that the main thing she’s noticed is that #the kids she teaches (17 and 18) feel much less independent? and need more guidance #which again i think is a pandemic thing

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brittlebutch · 1 year ago

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Katja Cleaver doesn't get enough attention for being the most 'poor little meow meow' character i've ever seen in my life. literally off the walls 'she was found in a wet cardboard box on the side of the road' energy

#N posts stuff #her dad is so absent he thinks she's still 16 when she is already fully 18 years old #her dad is so absent that Katja considers it the GREATEST kindness she can give him to NEVER show him how sad that makes her #she didn't tell any of her friends about her birthday because she 'didn't wanna say anything' even though they've been friends for 2 years #her only friend for the first like 16 years of her life was her horse #the first time she thought she made a friend that 'friend' immediately turned around and kidnapped her #she made her first actual group of friends right after that and her dad does not know a single one of their names #she loves her horse so much that she eats dry fucking oats for breakfast because she likes it when they can share #her parents Forgot about her at school often enough for it to be a routine occurrence she had to figure out as a child #katja looked her Absent dad in the eyes and MEANT it when she said 'i think you're great because you stayed' bc her mom DIDNT #babygirl i love you <3 #d20: seven maidens #dimension 20 #edit: i cannot BELIEVE i forgot to mention that even though she has friends she still continued to wear the single half of a friendship #heart necklace that no one else had the second half of bc she didn't feel confident enough to ask if any of her friends would wear it

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britneyshakespeare · 4 months ago

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you know someday i'm gonna feel so good when i have my student loans paid off

that ain't gonna be soon, trust me, but i think about it